Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Actuarial Recruiter Convinces Actuary He's a Perfect Match for MidAtlantic Client Seeking FSA

"She told me I was special," explains a recently relocated actuary. He's talking about a recruiter, someone he's never met. But, "she had a sweet voice and giggled a lot."

In the course of a thirty minute phone call this recruiter was able to instill a kernel of inspiration in the actuary's mind.  He had been in his role a while and the recruiter's job had "great opportunities for advancement."  He wasn't excited about the prospect of moving his family, but there was "a very generous relocation package."  The kicker was when the recruiter said that she "couldn't imagine a more qualified person for the position" and then she proceeded to marvel at his financial modeling experience, data manipulation skills, and reporting work.

Now, a few months into the new job, we asked the actuary if the move was worth it, if the job lived up to the hype.

"It's not exactly what I imagined." He confessed.  He then rushed off to a local adult nightclub, claiming that he's the favorite client of one of the dancers there and he didn't want to disappoint her.

We tracked down the recruiter, who spoke very candidly about the recruiting world.

"Our job is kind of like finding a prom date for your least attractive friend.  Although, sometimes I think our clients expect us to find them their soul mate."

When asked about the relative qualifications of actuarial prospects, she admitted that they are all pretty much the same. The key difference is whether or not she can get them to take the bait.  "A willing candidate is a winning candidate."  That is why she coats everything in rainbows and unicorns.

"A prospect may be walking into a volatile company with douche bag managers, but we say the job offers professional growth. Or the company is simply desperate for a warm body to do the work nobody else wants, but we can't let on that there was no one available.  That brings back too many harsh memories of being the last kid picked for dodge ball in recess."

There is at least on reason for actuaries not to be completely skeptical when the phone rings from an unknown number. After the last sparkly flake of glitter falls off the illusion, chances are there is still data to be analyzed, models to be run, and a computer that will heed your every command. While those things may be dull, they are constants in a variable world.  And it could be worse.  You could be a lumberjack.

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