Party Like an Actuary - Opinion

In my last piece, I talked about how sex appeal is never the first thing that comes to mind when someone thinks of actuaries, when in reality it’s been there all along. The other thing that we tend to hide from the world is our propensity to throw excellent parties.

Actuaries Force Lumberjacks to Refresh Image

Actuaries came in number 1 in the CareerCast.com ranking of 200 jobs, snug right between a Software Engineer and an HR Manager.  Lumberjacks came in last.

In an effort to change their image, lumberjacks across the country have traded in their flannel shirts and beards for polos and clean shaves.

SOA Plans New Exam Track - Anything That Deals With Insurance

Recently the SOA released news that it would offer a General Insurance track.  While this in itself is groundbreaking news, it overshadows an even more aggressive agenda of expansion that’s in the works.

Sources close to the inner working of the society indicate an even broader track with the minimal requirement that it some way ‘deals with insurance’.  Candidates that successfully complete this track would get their DWI certificate.

Possible syllabus items include:

p         Animals and Insurance:  How to Pick a Mascot/Logo/Spokes-creature for your company

p         Things that start with i

p         Material from other professions (CPA, CFA, Medical Boards, JD)

p         Some semi-professional exams – Bartending Certification,  Class A Drivers Test , etc

Candidates will also have to demonstrate mastery of sports trivia, pop culture, the game of Monopoly, and select passages from the sacred texts of most world religions.

 There was some slight confusion over a connect-the-dots and color-by- number placemat from a local dining establishment.  It turned out that it wasn’t part of the proposed material, but was accidently placed there after the committee leader took his family out for Friday night dinner.

The SOA hopes to give out several hundred DWIs over the next few years.

Blue Book To Change Color

Driven by a combination of regulatory changes, updated technology, and Kermit the Frog’s Rainbow Connection, Ameriprise Financial leaders have proposed a radical change to annual reporting.

Currently they are evaluating a series of colors for the next few years, including daffodil yellow, sunny peach, hunter green, and cotton candy pink.